Worst Movies of 2012

Alright! I've finally sat through enough of 2012's filth to assemble what I believe is a reasonably accurate list for the worst movies of 2012. There were a few critical flops that I didn't get around to seeing, so your list may differ quite a bit from mine. I'll say this, I didn't get a chance to see Piranha 3DD though I liked the first one, I heard the sequel lacked the bite of it's predecessor (sorry, that was a bad pun, but I couldn't help it). I also missed This Means War. I couldn't find a place to rent it and there was no way I was going to buy the DVD. Also didn't get around to seeing That's My Boy, namely because I have just given up on Adam Sandler. There are a few others I didn't get around to checking out, but I feel like I got most of them. So without further ado, here are my picks for the worst movies of 2012.

10. Alex Cross
Tyler Perry's first major break away from comedy... is probably going to end up being his last. I'll be honest, I've never been a fan of Perry's work. He seems like a nice enough guy and it's pretty cool that he has written, directed, and acted in a number of successful comedies. Still, they're just not my kind of films, and neither is this one. Perry was trying hard, I could tell, but he was let down by a miserable script and a director who just phoned in his directorial duties. The only thing that kind of bordered on "so-bad-its-good" was the equally miscast performance of Matthew Fox, who was so over the top that he was, at times, somewhat hilarious. The rest of the movie is just dull and forgettable. On the bright side for Tyler Perry, it doesn't look like the Madea films are going away time soon... so, good for him I guess.

9. Paranormal Activity 4
I've been pretty forgiving toward the not-so-subtle flaws that has plagued this series from the beginning, but I finally drew the line with Part 4. I don't expect much from these movies, so long as each entry delivers a few memorable moments of shocks and suspense. Paranormal Activity 4, however, in addition to falling victim to flat acting, a lame story, and weak ending, just isn't all that scary. Aside for one or two passable scenes, it's just too damn boring to make any real impression. Well, the series was fun while it lasted.

8. The Watch
You would think a film directed by The Lonely Island's Akiva Schaffer and starring Ben Stiller, Jonah Hill, Vince Vaughn, and Richard Ayoade would have a few laughs, wouldn't you? While it did get an occasional chuckle here and there, it was mostly a huge waste of time. The film never found a consistent tone, switching back and forth between crude adult-oriented jokes, juvenile teen boy humor, and uninspired sci-fi action. Even the film's few honest to God laughs were mostly taken from previous and better movies. In short... it blows.

7. House at the End of the Street
Normally I hate to see talented actors starring in terrible movies, but honestly, I don't think Jennifer Lawrence is going to have any trouble sweeping this stinker under the rug. Lawrence does what she can with such a boring character, and while her natural skill brings a touch of credibility to the film, it doesn't save this horror dud from sucking. The premise had some interesting ideas, but the execution was just forgettable and generic as it's uninspired title. No scares, little suspense, and some of the worst dialogue I've heard in years hold back this piece of crap from amounting to anything other than forgettable. Normally, a film like this would have pulled down it's star with it, but like I said, Jennifer Lawrence is going to do just fine. With a well-received role in The Hunger Games (though I personally didn't care much for that one) an Oscar nominated part in Silver Linings Playbook (possibly a win, we'll find out soon), she'll have no problem rebounding from this.

6. The Lorax
Can we please not get any more feature-length Dr. Seuss adaptations? While I'll always say that you can make a good movie out of anything, I've run out of hope in believing that studios will ever actually invest the necessary time and resources into pulling off a decent adaptation. The Lorax is a dumb and annoying cgi family flick that dilutes the message of it's source material to make room for an uninspired story, stock characters, grating humor, and annoying songs. Eeesh... at least some of the animation was nice. Don't bother with this one. If you've got kids who want to see it, read the book to them instead.

5. One For The Money
I'll come out and say it... I'm not a fan of Katherine Heigl. Sure, Knocked Up was good, but the rest of her filmography, namely her numerous romcoms, have ranged from forgettable to flat-out infuriating (in case you were wondering, no I've never been into Grey's Anatomy either). While she's not a terrible actress per se, she lacks a certain personality and has virtually no comic timing. One For The Money might be her worst film ever, with a script and premise that almost borders on sexist when it's not boring you to death. Katherine Heigl is a bounty hunter... no, that doesn't sound like it would be a good movie now does it? The concept is uninspired, the jokes aren't funny, the film isn't exciting... it's just an all around terrible movie. Even if your a fan of Heigl, skip this one.

4. Gone
Like I said about House at the End of the Street, I hate to see talented actors brought down by shitty movies. Amanda Seyfried has shown that she possesses some real acting ability, but keeps getting cast in God awful movies. She does her best in Gone, but even her talent can't salvage much out of this forgettable thriller. I'm having trouble thinking of things to even say about the film, because honestly, it made practically no impression whatsoever. It has an uninspired concept, the mystery isn't all that interesting, and... that's about it. It's a pretty fitting title though, I must admit. One day, you'll watch it, and the next day, your memories of the film will be as the title implies... Gone.

3. Mirror Mirror
It's a nice looking movie, no doubt about that. Director Tarsem Singh has a good eye for visuals. The production and costume designs are quite creative, I'll say that much. Unfortunately, the rest of the movie is just awful! Julia Roberts is just too reserved to convincingly pull of campy humor, and unfortunately the movie puts a lot of faith in her role. In the long run, I don't know if any actor, no matter how talented, could have pulled off much entertainment value with a script this bad. What could have been an enjoyable camp fest or cute retelling of a classic fairy tale is instead an annoying, infuriating, and God awful snooze-fest. If you haven't seen this one... keep on doing that.

2. Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance
I admit that Ghost Rider isn't an easy superhero to adapt to film, but come on! The sequel to the only somewhat remembered 2007 film manages the rare feat of being both stupid and boring. The effects are a bit better this time around, but they're still pretty dodgy in most spots. The action is too damned erratic, the characters aren't interesting, and the story is predictable as hell. Even another psychotic performance from Nicolas Cage couldn't save this one... honestly, his shtick has been really wearing thin for a while now. The only positive thing I can say about Ghost Rider 2, is that it's not THE worst movie of 2012. That title goes to the following...

1. The Devil Inside
Wow! What a mess of a film we have here! I will say this, the idea of a horror film that explores the scientific and religious theories behind possession and exorcism is actually an interesting idea. Not to mention, the concept of renegade/underground exorcists is intriguing (mainly in a B-Movie kind of way, but whatever, a good idea is a good idea). Unfortunately, any promise this movie may have possessed (no pun intended) was let down by terrible execution. The actors... crap, the suspense... non-existent, the story... derivative, the ending... AWFUL!!! This film, has what might be the worst, cop out, "screw you" of an ending I've ever seen. Everything up until then was bad, but it was that ending that not only reserved it a spot on my "Worst Of" list but my choice for the worst movie of 2012! It's that bad folks.

So those are the worst movies I saw from 2012. If you haven't seen these movies and are thinking about checking them out... I wouldn't recommend it. Agree or disagree with my list? Leave a comment below and tell me your choices for the worst of 2012.